Wondraism is the new wave of the future! Follow Wondra and you will be saved! Resist and you shall be torn to bloody strips of cat food! How do I avoid this bleak future, you ask? It's easy! Just follow these three easy steps:
1. BOW TO WONDRA!
2. WORSHIP WONDRA!
3. BE WONDRA'S SLAVE!
Sound like a drag? It is! It would suck to be anyone but Wondra! But wait, don't give up your life just yet! There are a few advantages to Wondraism:
Free sex
Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex! That's right, sex! You love it! I love it! Best of all, it's free! ... Sex for everyone. You want it? You've got it! (Though obviously not with Wondra, as you're mere unworthy slaves.)
Free chocolate.
That's right, folks, FREE chocolate! In every size, shape, flavor and variety! Yummy chocolate and it's all yours-Just bow!
A lifetime of servitude.
Servitude means never having to say I'm sorry. How could you go wrong? Let someone else make your decisions for you and you can never make the wrong ones! You can't loose! Let Wondra make your decisions for you, and you'll never have to worry again! So, folks, now that you know what you could gain (free sex), or what you could loose (your life), go for it! Bow to Wondra.
Remember: Don't delay, bow today!
**Urgent!**
Please click HERE for an urgent health update concerning Wondraism!
