ANOTHER PINK ROSE

He walked slowly and carefully as much to hide as because of the fear present with every step. He had not seen a demon for several weeks.

That was a good sign. "Right!" he thought.

There was only one demon left to face and the one that lived within him. He touched the flask of brandy he carried in his pocket, just in case. He hadn't had a drink since he had joined his friends in a toast to heroes. It was as much a toast to himself as it was to them. A toast to Jason. King Jason. A toast to the missing demons. A toast to his dead family. A toast to the one thing he should have done, did not have the courage to do, and had regretted all his life. Could he ever say he was not still a coward if he didn't try?

When he left the main road on foot, walking down the lane and then the path he had not transversed for years, wonder and doubt again filled his mind. Should he pretend he had not thought about her? Pretend that had just woke up sober one morning and thought "maybe I should go see Alcmeme." She wouldn't buy it. He had lived his life too publicly. He was going to have to tell her the truth, as much as it would make him feel like a coward.

He walked through the gate and into her garden. He was glad to see the flowers were still in full bloom as beautiful and as fragrant as he remembered them. He stopped and surveyed the roses, picking the one most perfect, a pink one that reminded him of her.

He felt his knees go weak as he opened the door. The look on her face said it all. The smile, perhaps she thought it might be her son, stayed on her lips, but her blue eyes grew wide and questioning. She looked much the same. Her blonde curls showed white at the roots, but he knew his hair was shot with gray. They both had new lines on their faces, even then he thought he might have more. The indicia of a good life as opposed to a bad one had brought them together in age.

"You are. . . " The words came hard to her. "The last person I expected to see, King Jason."

"So it's King Jason now, when was I ever that to you?" He wanted to grab her and hold her in his arms and kiss her passionately. But he bowed and presented her with the rose.

"A king attempts to buy my favor with one of my own flowers?"

"My lady, there are no other flowers in all of my kingdom that might come close to the price of your favor, except for those which grow so perfectly in your garden."

"You always did have a way with words, Jason." She laughed and threw her arms around him and kissed him. "Welcome back, it has been a while."

He sat at the table, in the chair he always sat in, and watched her preparing him dinner, as if he had been gone a day or a week or a month. He tried to remember the last time they had been together. Really been together. He saw her once shortly after Hercules family had been killed, but that was in Corinth not at her house. He remembered the time, just after he had left Media and announced that he would marry Glauce, when he had come to tell Hercules and his family. He was excited about the thought of having a wife and a family, but worried how he would tell his long time secret lover. The woman he could never marry --his best friend's mother. Yet that night when Alcmeme had so politely asked if he wouldn't be more comfortable at her house than in Hercules's crowded abode, he had held her in his arms again and realized that he could never be completely happy with what the fates had planned with his life. Could he tell her now what he couldn't tell her then?

"Come sit. You don't have to bother cooking for me. I certainly get enough to eat in the palace. I came here to see you, not eat your wonderful food."

"Why did you come here, Jason?"

"Come and sit beside me. I want you near, so I can hold your hand when I tell you."

She walked over and stood behind him with her hands on his shoulders and bent to kiss the top of his head. "You don't have to go through all the details, I've heard most of them. The advantage or disadvantage of your being king. The subjects like to talk."

"Then you know of my failures." He reached up and took her hand and steered her into the chair beside him. His lips grazed her fingers and asked for forgiveness before his voice could. He could not read her smile. Even more today he wondered if she it were the accepting smile of a mother or the understanding smile of a lover.

"Everything you did Jason. I knew your reasoning. The only thing that bothered me was that you did nothing well. I so wanted you to be happy."

"That eluded me because of the mistake I made with the first step."

"I cried inside when you failed, over and over."

"And I cried, too. To watch innocents die. My own innocent children."

"Even when you moved to Argos, I heard tales. They hurt so bad Jason. I shared your suffering."

"From this day forward, the memory of all my suffering, will pale beside the fact that I made you suffer, Alcmeme. I am glad I didn't know, or perhaps I WOULD have killed myself."

She rose and went to the fire and pulled off a smoking kettle of meat and vegetables. The tears running down her face were not enough to save its contents. "I'm so sorry, Jason."

He knew she wasn't talking about the stew.

The supper was only olives, cheese, bread and wine. She worried about the wine, but when he refilled her glass the second time he poured none for himself. They hadn't talked much as if both were wondering where the evening would go next. They both knew, but could not find the words.

"It has been a long journey." He put his hands behind his head and yawned.

"And a long time. And, by the way, I recognize that 'I'm sleepy' move when Hercules uses it with Iolaus."

"Caught me, did you."

"Do you want to move by the fire . . . "

"I feel an or. . . coming on."

She took his hand and led him where they both so wanted to go.

She studied the closed eyes and the faint smile remaining on his face as her lay beside her spent in her bed.

"What happened to the young stud that wanted to go at it all night."

"You can't be serious, Alcmeme. You mean . . . "

"I'm the one whose memory should be failing me." She ran her hand down his chest. He knew there were gray hairs there, too.

"Nothing has failed you, Alcmeme, absolutely nothing. You were just as I remembered, wonderful."

"I had a young lover, you know. It ended badly, very badly."

"How would I know? Hercules does not talk about his own sex life, let alone that of his mother."

"I think he was totally shocked when he learned I actually had a sex life."

"If he was shocked then, what would he say now?"

"Shush, he will never know."

"He'll know, soon enough."

"What, you're going to tell him."

"I suppose we should tell him first, do you want to do it?"

"I see absolutely no reason why Hercules needs to know about this. It has always been our secret. I swear he has absolutely no idea."

"And he'd swear that no one knows about Iolaus."

"I don't think anyone knows, but us. My son got his ability to keep secrets from his mother."

"Alcmeme, I am going to be coming here a lot. I'm moving back to Corinth. I'm sick of that dirty old seaport. And I want to be close to you."

"I think you'd better concentrate on getting your kingdom back and running, Jason. Your people deserve that."

"And what do you deserve, Alcmeme?"

"Right now, perhaps another kiss. Tomorrow, maybe another pink rose."