TITLE: Repair Detail
AUTHOR: MikeJoe aka Michael J. Gallagher ( mikejoe@odyssey.net )
RATING: PG-13 for mild sexual references
SUMMARY: Harper and Rommie have a heart-to-heart in the wake of BOTB
-- Answering "Sex(?) on the Maru" challenge (if you allow a "tame" interpretation)
SPOILERS FOR "BELLY OF THE BEAST"
DISCLAIMER: I don't own DROM; this is just for fun.
+++
"I never thought -- " Rommie said and broke off, hanging onto the railing in the *Eureka Maru's* cockpit while the freighter banged and rattled out of the slipstream; on the monitor above the pilot's seat, Rommie's ship self, the *Andromeda Ascendant,* emerged from the portal.
"Never thought what, Rommie?" Beka prodded with a half teasing tone.
The beautiful android with gleaming blue hair had no choice but to answer. "Well, of course I had *heard* of ships losing their slipstream drives and needing another vehicle to open a portal for them," she said, "but I'd never believed it would happen to me. I was actually quite vocal on the subject." She shuddered. "It's slightly embarrassing."
Beka grinned. "Happens to all of us, Rommie. Big and powerful or little and homey doesn't matter."
"Oh? Did it ever happen to the *Maru?*"
"No." Beka grinned. "And I don't expect it to."
Harper sauntered over from the engineering station. "Don't worry, Rom Doll. It's just a temporary inconvenience. Once you've munched a few asteroids, I'll whip up a new slip core and you'll be as good as new."
Rommie smiled. She hadn't thought much of Harper when he'd come aboard as Beka's engineer, but he'd taken fantastic care of her over the last two years. As arrogant as he sounded, she knew he wasn't really bragging about his capabilities. She could always take some comfort in that he would be there for her when she needed him.
"No one is munching anything until we get permission from the Burgers on Augusta Drift," Beka said, piloting her ship towards the massive space station. "They have title to every bit of matter in this system and zealously guard every molecule. Dylan and I are going to have to use every bit of shuck and jive we have to get us out of here without signing over our great-great-grandchildren."
"Yeah," Harper said, "looks like they've added on to the place -- "
"We won't be staying long," Beka snapped. (Rommie frowned, puzzled at Beka's anger, even if it was, once again, Harper's fault.) "The only reason we're here is this is as far as we could go on the *Maru's* reserve fuel tanks. We get permission to munch enough rocks and get out of here." She consulted a control panel. "ATC says they *still* don't have a docking slip big enough for you, Rommie. Cheapskates. They've assigned you a lagrange point you'll have to hover at."
"Acknowledged," Rommie said. "Moving into position."
"Harper, I want you to do a *thorough* damage assessment on the *Maru,*" Beka said, moving her ship in for docking. "Go over it with a microscope if you have to. Rommie, I want you to help him and *do not let him out of your sight.*"
"All right," Rommie said ... still slightly confused about what was going on.
****
"Overall, ol' EM came through ok," Harper said, passing a scanner of the *Maru's* engine block. "Damn, this puppy is built tough."
"Tougher than me?" Rommie teased. "I thought I was the toughest there is."
"Well... Yer tough and *beautiful, Rommie." Harper sipped his can of Sparky Cola. "Actually, all things considered .... When y'think about some of the scrapes we were in before we found you, usin' the *Maru* as bomber against a space beast isn't that unbelievable, although I'm amazed the ship didn't break in half."
"A credit to your skill in upgrading it, I'm sure." Rommie expected Harper to pat himself on the back.
He didn't. "Not really." He sipped some more Sparky. "Let's just say that when you haul some cargos that people don't want you to haul, might arrest for and do horrible things to for hauling -- and I'm NOT admitting to anything like that -- you have to be able to pull a heavy load but also maneuver fast when you have to."
"Conflicting design specs." Rommie took another look around the beat up little ship. "And Beka's father had to reconcile them when he built it."
"Eeeyup. Say this about Beka's psycho dirt bag hopefully dead for good this time ex boyfriend Bobby, he kept this thing together. But those times Beka kicked him out, it was all up to *me.* Talk about on the job training!"
"I thought you came in with some talent as an engineer."
"Yeah, but little things! Y'know a holovision system breaks or you have to st -- to START a skimmer .... "
"Harper, I won't arrest you for everything you might mention."
"Just takin' no chances, Doll, with your permanent record. But like I said, holovision, skimmers, *androids.* Would you believe me if I told you that the Drago-Kasvo slavers on Earth were the single biggest customer for Vitaltronics Industries Pleasure Princesses? I spent a summer repairing them in my uncle's shop."
Rommie smirked. "It would explain a few things." The smirk faded. "I'm curious -- what were the repairs for?"
"Let's say serious user mishandling of the merchandize. It was a crying shame, Rommie. Vitaltronics makes these beautiful, uber intelligent androids, who can hold their own conferring with ten Chinheads in five languages or show you ways to do the wild thing you never knew existed, and what did the freakin' dragons use them for? Punching bags."
"You're kidding."
"It's true! Beating on your wife or your kids can get you the death penalty in any pride, even the dragons, so they rent a 'droid, pound the crap out of it, and sent 'em back to us. You don't know what pitiful is until this android tries to smile at you when half her face has been ripped off. They were so ... brave about it. When they were just too bashed up, we used to tell the dragons we'd thrown them out, then recondition them and send them down to the spaceports. They got resold to spacers; some of them could function as ship's AIs."
"Well, at least there were some happy endings. Is that how you got the connections to contact Beka?"
"Yep. And I land in the middle of this gig." He looked around and sighed. "Y'know, Rommie, once in a while, as much as I love you, I wish I was back in that shop."
"You'd go crazy in a week for nothing to do."
"Maybe." He sipped more Sparky and checked his flexie. "We're done here; I can't do much more until your machine shops are up and running. But mostly we gotta replace the AP tanks and the *Maru'll* be fine unless SOMEBODY wants to play Star Wars again."
"I'm not going to ask what that means; we should check the cargo pod."
****
"Well?" Harper said, lying on the cargo pod's deck, looking down into one of the docking tunnels to the *Maru.* "What do you think?"
Rommie passed her hand over the seam in the tunnel where the pod connected to the starship. "You're right, Harper -- it's a little warped. The clamps on this connection point won't fit eventually."
"Crap. Any guess as to how long?"
"Best estimate, based on current usage patterns ..... about 150 years. Should we get it into a shipyard now or wait until my ship self is fixed up?"
"I think it can wait. Although taking another look at it later wouldn't be bad idea." Harper checked his flexie. "Well, that's it for the pod .... and the *Maru.* And I'm hungry."
Rommie dropped down the ladder, got out of the way while Harper descended, followed him into the *Maru's* galley .... and watched as he went from empty cupboard to empty cupboard.
"Crap, Rommie! Don't tell me there's no food on board."
"All right, I won't tell you that."
"Something to add to the list." Harper winced.
"You could go aboard the drift and get something to eat. I'll mind the store here."
"Uh .... no, Rommie I'm good, I'm good. Really. Not as hungry as I thought."
"Harper, I would have thought you of all people would know better than to lie to me. Your stomach is most definitely empty. What's wrong with this station?"
"Uh .... "
"Would it have anything to do with why Beka is so angry at you?"
"Yeah, it would."
"Well .... if I'm not prying .... "
"Oh, I got busted here for public lewdness. Cops decided to hit the local cyberbrothel up for more protection money, basically."
Rommie smirked. "I see."
"Yeah," Harper groused, "and Beka read me the riot act for 'ruining' it for her here. Never mind that at the same time she and Bobby were off pumping God knows what into their bloodstreams! I get busted and *I'm* the bad guy."
"Well, you are a bad guy who has to eat. Beka ordered me to assist you and not let you out of my sight. I intend to do that." She closed her eyes. "Updating my mainframe on our activities; logging damage assessment into *Maru's* data banks." She opened her eyes. "And I have identified an affordable eatery sufficiently far enough from the local bordello to assuage any concerns."
Harper couldn't keep the dreamy look off his face. "Rommie .... what would I do without you?"
"In this instance? Either starve or give yourself a fatal sugar buzz from too much Sparky Cola. Shall we .... ?"
****
"You can order something, you know," Harper said as he shoveled food into his face. "You have a digestive system, and you won't stand out."
Sitting across from Harper in a booth at the greasy spoon she'd guided him to, Rommie let herself smile. "Thank you, Harper, but I'm all right. And synthetics are accepted here a bit more than elsewhere, it seems."
Harper nodded, still chewing. Rommie watched him eat. How odd .... there was so much she knew about Harper, and so much she didn't know.
Maybe she could try to make conversation? "So, this is what your life was like before you rescued me from the black hole?" Rommie asked. "Operating out of places like this?"
Harper nodded and swallowed. "You may have noticed that the *Maru* doesn't have a lot of the bells and whistles you come with. And it gets pretty cramped. After a few months in that can, you need to find your own space. Augusta Drift, L. D., Sheherezade .... that's what they're good for."
"What were your missions like? And don't worry, I'll have a malfunction which will prevent me from remembering anything incriminating."
"Unless you want to blackmail me later."
"Harper .... C'Mon. If you don't want to tell me, fine, but give me a break. I'm trying to be nice. I just want to learn a little more about one of my closest friends. Ok?"
Harper nodded while chewing, thought, and chuckled. He swallowed. "Oh, man ..... We had some scrapes, Rommie. Jeez, where do I start? With the time Beka and Bobby were duplicated? Or how about when I got married?"
"Excuse me!?"
"Well, it wasn't exactly for love. And not for THAT, either! Let's say it was a marriage of convenience because I found breathing convenient." He toyed with his food. "But mostly, it was *boring.* I was actually kinda relieved when Beka moved us out of here."
"Oh, really?"
(Behind them, at the entrance, a blonde woman in a revealing red dress came in through the front door and peered in the direction of the booths.)
"Yeah," Harper said. "In the name of getting a legit gig, Beka had got us a contract with an agricultural equipment producer that was based here. He had a factory-direct business targeting all the agro colonies within two or three slips of here. So we would sit around here and wait for them to get an order. We'd deliver the parts, come back, and wait for the next order. And after about six months of that, I was ready to kill somebody. Anybody."
Rommie found herself chuckling. "Oh, man .... I can relate to that."
"Really?"
(The blonde had started creeping along the booths in their direction.)
"Yes," Rommie said. "You may have noted I tend to be a bit aggressive. All of us were like that."
"Really? Never would have guessed."
"Yes, well, when the Commonwealth was negotiating the Treaty of Antares with the Magog, my battle group was assigned to escort civilian transports operating near the Magog territories. Of course, you know as well as I the Magog don't go for a well-protected target, so of course, the ships under my protection were never attacked. This is how I was after that mission had been going for a while." Rommie clasped her hands in front of her and put a serious look on her face. "Situation nominal, Captain; no threats in sensor range." Rommie held the serious look for moment, then crossed her eyes and tilted her head. "No, absolutely nuuuuuuhhtheeeeeng wrong ANYWHEERE. I'm a little teapot, short and stout .... "
Harper almost choked on his food for laughing.
"We had a record number of war games and military exercises that year," Rommie said.
"Gee," Harper said. "I wonder -- "
"Rommie!?" The blonde had stopped by their booth and was smiling down at the *Andromeda's* avatar. "Ohmygod it's you!?"
Harper and Rommie looked up. "Gigi!?" they chorused. Then they looked at each other and chorused again: "You know her?"
"Well, she's the AI at the cyberbrothel I mentioned," Harper said. "But I didn't think she had an android avatar."
"Well, I didn't," Gigi said, plunking down next to Rommie. "Not until you popped up, Rommie. Now humanoids are all the rage! You're a trend setter, you know that?"
"I am?" Rommie pitched her eyes sharply up at her blue hair.
"Yes! And it looks like you're the one behind the neo-Egyptian look, too," Gigi said. "Who'd'a thought the High Guard's biggest fuddy-duddy would be on the cutting edge of fashion?"
"Wait a sec," Harper said. "You were High Guard!?"
"Yep."
"You never told me!"
"We'd only just met, and I only share personal stuff with people I've known for a while." She clasped Rommie's hand. "But we have so much to talk about! Let's go back to my place."
"Uhm," Rommie said, "that might not be a good idea."
"Nonsense! We're all friends here."
"I'm still eating," Harper said.
"Is that all?" Gigi signaled to the waitress. "Dayna? He'll have his to go."
****
"So this is where you ended up," Rommie said as she and Harper (still eating) tried to be casual on the plush divan in Gigi's sitting room. Dimly lit and with red walls, the place was loaded with erotic objet d'arts.
"Well, more or less," Gigi said. "Some salvagers found my mainframe fifty years after I was hulled at Witchhead and incorporate me into this drift. I've been here since the beginning."
"And you've been a cyberbrothel all this time?"
"Well, for the last thirty years or so. I've been several businesses; this is just my latest gig. It's all about being of service, Rommie, you know that."
"*Of course.*"
"In fact, you'd be surprised how many organic/AI couples come in here. I have some rudimentary programs if you want to -- "
"NO," Rommie said, hoping she cut off any chance for Harper to reply. "We're due back at our ship soon anyway."
"Suit yourself," Gigi said, picking up a stack of flexies. "I'm not just this business, you know; I'm on the chamber of commerce, and I'm involved in many enterprises around this sector, including some tourist attractions you and your crew might find interesting. And if you change your mind about coming back with your scrumptious little friend here, I've added a coupon for a preferred couple's discount."
****
Rommie sat on the steps down to the *Maru's* pilot's station, looking at her ship self on the monitor. She supposed it was good that she'd met a High Guard AI who hadn't gone insane since The Fall, but on the other hand ....
Harper yawned and stretched as, stripped to his t-shirt and boxer shorts, he came into the cockpit. He caught sight of the monitor and smiled. "Now there's a sight for sore eyes."
"You think so?" Rommie asked.
Harper sat down next to her. "You don't?"
Rommie curled her lip. "Well ..... "
"Oh, you're not going to tell me you think you -- the *Andromeda* -- is ugly or fat, are you?"
"All right -- I won't tell you that."
"Typical woman."
"Wha -- ? Femininity -- or your sexist perceptions of it -- have nothing to do with it. Form should follow function, and my design is hardly purely functional. In fact, I wonder if it wasn't drug-induced."
"Oh, so you'd rather look like the *Maru*?"
"Well --- "
"You'd rather be a 'flying slag heap'? You wouldn't want to have people admire you?"
"I admit there is some ... gratification in being admired."
"Ha!"
"But it is not at the top of my list of priorities."
"Sure it ain't."
Rommie just rested her head on her hands, staring out into space.
"Is this really about you?" Harper asked. "Or about Gigi?"
"I can't imagine being anything other than what I am now," Rommie said. "Gigi may have fared better than Pax or the *Balance* but .... I get so afraid sometimes .... "
"Don't worry, Rommie, I won't let you end up like your crazy siblings."
"And after you're gone? I'll outlive you, you know. I'll outlive you all."
"You're tough, Rommie. You'll be oh-hoh-hoh --- " He yawned. "Ok."
"You're tired. Get to bed."
"You're dodging the issue."
"Maybe. Maybe you've made me feel a little better."
"Can I do more?"
"Not what you have in mind. Just go to bed, Harper, and don't spoil the moment."
"All right, Rom Doll." But he still leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
****
Rommie busied herself at different stations while keeping track of Harper through the *Maru's* internal sensors; she knew when he climbed up into his bunk and heard his "Good Night, Rom Doll." Then she stood in the middle of the deck, doing nothing. Through her radio link to the *Maru's* computers, she could monitor it and its environs, and keep in touch with her ship self, without moving from that spot all night long.
All.
Night.
Long.
"Oh, what the hell," Rommie said. She headed back along the passageway. "Harper? Move over."
"Wh -- what?" he said sleepily. "Rommie -- ?"
"I said, 'Move over.' What part of that requires elaboration?" The lights came up as Rommie entered the bunk area, more for Harper's benefit than hers. She kicked off her shoes and quickly stripped to her underwear. She flexed her legs and gently leaped up next to Harper's bunk, hanging there by one arm from a ceiling strut, while Harper looked at her with wide eyes. "Well? That doesn't look 'moved over' to me."
"Uh, ok ... " Harper squirmed back against the wall, pulling down the blankets. Rommie levered her body onto the bunk and let go of the ceiling strut. Harper pulled the blankets over her and she snuggled up against him as the lights went down again.
Rommie squirmed and pressed a little harder against Harper (though remaining mindful of his fragile body's tolerances); the situation was not unpleasant. "Yes, yes, yes," she said, sounding quite comfortable. "Lovely, lovely, lovely." She finally settled against him, lying still. "Quite agreeable .... nnnnnn."
"Oh, crap," Harper groaned.
"What!?" Rommie almost panicked. Had she hurt him or made a faux pas!?
"Oh, no."
"What, what, what!?"
"I've created a cuddler."
"Oh." Was that all? "I guess you have. Congratulations." She settled down again. Harper finally adjusted to the situation. She felt him play with her hair and rub her shoulders, which only made her more comfortable.
"Rommie?"
"Yes, Harper?" She actually sounded sleepy.
"I love you. Really love you."
If Rommie had blood, it would have run cold. She'd been dreading this conversation for almost two years; she's been aware of too many similar situations among her organic High Guard crews ending with the male breaking all ties with the female he'd ... admired .... to not worry about it.
"I know," Rommie said. "I've always known. And I love you, too. But ... but, uh .... "
"'But not that way.'"
"No. I'm sorry."
Rommie's sensors detected the turmoil in his brain's emotional centers; she felt as if she were on the brink of disaster, and held him a little tighter as if that would keep him from going over it.
"It's not as if I don't care about you at all," Rommie went on. "I do. I feel closer to you than to almost any other crewman who's been aboard me. You're one of the most important sentient beings in my existence. I can't be your lover, but I've tried my best to be your friend and your comrade. I wouldn't bother if you weren't important to me and you are .... "
"Hey, hey, hey, it's all right." He stroked her hair; Rommie realized she'd almost flown off the handle. "It's ok. I knew what was what from the beginning. It's all right." He kissed her forehead.
"So ... you won't leave me?"
"Why would I do that?"
Rommie almost winced at her own question. She'd had to ask, though.
"Can I ask you something?" Harper asked.
"Sure," Rommie said.
"Why did you keep this body? I kept expecting you or Dylan to make me dismantle it, or get me to take out the 'extra features,' but it never happened. Any particular reason why not?"
Rommie frowned; she didn't think twice about the answer. "No mystery there, Harper. I like it."
"That's it?"
"Why not -- oh, you're thinking -- ?"
"Uh-huh."
"Well .... In all honesty, I can't tell you how much a consideration that was. Isn't that funny? But after I'd had this body for a few days, I decided I liked it as was and would keep it; I don't recall thinking anything else about it."
"Even with the 'unnecessary parts'?"
"Why not? You have unnecessary parts."
"Should I take that personally?"
"I was referring to your appendix, your tailbone, and your wisdom teeth. They're evolutionary holdovers, with no bearing on modern life. And part of the reason humans get bad backs is because your skeletons are optimized for walking on all fours, not upright."
"Huh. I didn't know that."
"Well, now you do."
Harper yawned and sighed; he played with her hair a little. "I guess we both been stupid tonight."
"Well, what's a little stupidity between two infallible geniuses?" Rommie asked.
"Nothin' if no one hears about it."
"Right." Rommie settled down against Harper again; she felt his emotional tumult pass as he relaxed towards sleep. Rommie felt herself sinking into the sensations of being so close to him: Not only could she feel his brain activity, but his pulse, body temperature, the churning of the chemical factories in his cells ....
It was like snuggling with a galaxy. A warm galaxy who'd always loved her, accepted her, taken care of her ....
Something *pinged* on the edge of her awareness.
"Harper?" Rommie said, sounding very groggy. "Harp?"
He woke up. "Huh -- wha -- whoa -- "
"Harper?"
"Hey, Rommie .... how long was I asleep?"
"Not long. Dylan and Beka are returning to the ship; she's mad as hell over something."
"What?"
"Nnnnn .... I think my mainframe shouted so loudly I can't make sense of it. But I think Beka wants your hide for a wall decoration."
"Mmmm .... maybe we should get up? Being caught like this would look bad."
"Agreed."
Neither budged.
"Rommie? Maybe we really should get up."
"I think so, too."
Neither stirred.
"We really in deep trouble?" Harper asked.
"I shouldn't think so," Rommie said. "We completed our assigned tasks, and I kept you out of trouble. We're ok."
"Ok."
So ok, neither tried to move.
The airlock slammed open and Beka surged in, Dylan in her wake; her face was red.
"LIGHTS!" The lights came up in the bunk area; Beka stood on the lower bunk across from Harper's. What she saw made her rage increase. "*ALL RIGHT!!!*" She dropped down to the deck. "Harper, you kick that floozie out of bed, get down here, and take it like a man!!"
"Huh?" Harper said.
"'Floozie'?" Rommie said, managing enough energy to poke out from under the blankets. "I've been called many things -- sometimes deservedly, I admit -- but that's a first."
"Rommie!?" Beka popped back onto the other bunk, trying to decipher the lumps in the blankets. "That's just you under there?"
"I should hope so."
"Well .... " Beka dropped back to the floor, her anger breaking apart against a wall of confusion. "But ... WHO WAS HE RUNNING AROUND THE DRIFT WITH?"
"Me."
"Start from the beginning, slowly."
"Harper and I completed the damage assessment. You will find the report in the *Maru's* data banks. Then Harper was hungry and there's no food aboard this ship .... "
"Rub it in, why don't ya," Harper groaned.
" .... I found a diner aboard the drift. We were then .... I suppose you could say 'Shanghaied' by the AI running the local cybernetic bordello."
"Really."
"She's an old friend, actually." Rommie shifted her gaze to Dylan. "Remember Gigi?"
Dylan winced and nodded.
"And while you two were there ... ?" Beka prodded.
"We talked for a while and came back here," Rommie answered.
"And by that you mean ... ?"
"We talked for a while and came back here."
"Ah .... Rommie?"
"Yes, Beka?"
"Why are you in bed with Harper right now?"
"Truthfully?"
"Yes."
"I was bored."
"I feel so special," Harper groaned.
"Ahhh .... " Beka struggled to come up with something but couldn't.
"Why don't we leave them alone?" Dylan said, putting an arm on Beka's shoulders and gently guiding her to the airlock.
"Uhhhh ... " Beka said.
"Yeah," Dylan said. "See you in the morning, guys." The airlock closed behind the two captains; the lights went down again. Rommie settled against Harper as he pulled the blankets back over her.
"Harper?"
"Yeah, Doll?"
"Humans have peculiar attitudes towards relationships."
"Oh, and who got it right? Nietzscheans?"
"Point taken. Good night, Harper."
"'Night, Doll face. Love you."
He fell asleep a few moments later; Rommie stayed by his side all night.