Watcher: Conception

 

I

The Day the World Went Away

 

        I fell into the darkest pit imaginable; the space between bliss and forgetfulness. I fell as the candles lit my face softly in the night; fell as my lover lay beside me. And I, unable to cry attention to my ails, let my head fall back- listless- restless- trailing myself to my nightmares.

        I am a woman with a faded past, who can’t remember the day I was born. My parents, hometown, siblings, past self, nothing has stayed with me. I knew only my two feet and the road ahead on the day I walked into the little country-like town, heels clicking on worn cobblestones.

        There was a fruit stand, the apples standing out like red rubies against the plain carton that contained them. My mouth watered, but I had not one cent on me, still, I reached and touched the firm skim- when my hand met another.

        He was somber underneath his dark hair, but his crimson eyes widened at my own. I digress…I did not know him, but I felt warm in a sense.

        Perhaps I should have known something.

        “I’m sorry, but do I know you?” He asked in a soft voice that hence yielded to his emotions. I shook my head; sent my hair flying and faltered for words.

        “What is your name?” He came a bit closer to me, my vision was filled with red; his eyes, the long cape he wore, the apples. I looked down, unsure.

        “I have been called Lokilos.”

        I could almost feel the shock that went through his body, and quite suddenly his arms collapsed around me.

        I gasped.

        “Vincent.”

        I fell.

       

 

The key is the heart…kill me…

 

        I woke in pain, shock, agony; physically fine but mentally in turmoil.

        The man, Vincent, was sitting beside me- head tilted to the side, studying my face.

        “You remember…me?” His right hand closed on my bare leg. I looked down at my plaid skirt, my feathered blouse; it all seemed so damn pointless now.

        “I don’t know…who I am.”

        “I see.” His face fell a bit, and he looked away.

        “You were…in love with me…I was…in love with you.” My words seemed so loud, his head snapped back to look at me. He licked his lips and came closer to me. My head went back automatically and he stared, bored, deeper into my eyes.

        My lips locked with him, and I felt tears drip from my eyes. He grabbed my lower back and almost fell on top of me. Our mouths danced, I soared so high that I almost felt real- alive.

        His chest pressed against mine and I cried out a bit and he pulled me so tight.

        “You were gone….” he whispered into my ear, I caught a glimpse of the before - but then it was gone.

        “I have something else I need to do.” I whispered back and licked down his neck. He shuddered against me, and the door to the large room burst open.

 

II

 

Fully Alive

 

        Cid burst into the room, arms full of brown bags and liquor.

        Vinnie, I’m hooooome!” Vincent jumped and looked down at Loki, not sure what to do or say. She returned his look of confusion, as Cid looked their way; he promptly dropped everything he was holding onto.

        “No. Fucking. Way.”  He blinked slowly, not realizing that he was standing in bourbon and vodka, “But you…you’re not supposed to be here.”

        “I’m not?”  Her voice asked softly and Cid strode toward her, roughly pushed her chin up and inspected her eyes closely.

        “No damn metal.”

        “Was there supposed to be?” Loki now sounded a bit fearful and Vincent gently pushed Cid’s hand away.

        “Enough. I’m not quite sure about this either.”

        “I think I need to sort this out myself.” Loki stood and turned to her back to the two men’s surprised faces. She walked out the door, feeling a bit dismayed but mostly confused.

 

*****

 

        Behind the large Victorian-esque mansion was a large mountain. I could barely make out a bridge at the top as well as something else, something big, perhaps a factory or something of that sense. I began my ascent as guilt tinged the back of my mind for leaving Vincent there with hardly an explanation. I had just met him, and already I was overcome by lust and a small helping of sorrow, like one would feel before they went away for a very long time. As I played these things over in my head, they didn’t make sense; it was like a puzzle with round pieces.

        Nothing fit.

        I stumbled over a large rock; sandals were just not good shoes for climbing up sides of things. An image came to my mind, pale and dusty like old film:

 

        I sat in a cage made of thick Plexiglas, surveying my surroundings. There was a great deal of monitors and beeping machines around me, as well as two people whose faces I could not see. One was closer to my right, writing on a small clipboard and muttering things I couldn’t hear. The other had his hand folded behind his back and seemed to be thinking a great deal. At last, he turned into the light, so I could view his thin face, beady eyes behind thick glasses, and hunchback in a lab coat.

        “She is stable now, Stephan. You may inject the next dose of Chroma 402A.”

        “Doctor, are you sure?”

        “Are you questioning my orders?”  Stephan cringed back from the other man, and went behind one of the monitors. My skin itched and I looked at the clear line coming from my arm. I tugged on it with my fingers and was rewarded with a small shock that bent my spine back toward my feet.

        “I don’t think so, 3217. I have no time to put another IV in you.”

        “The injection is ready, Doctor Hojo.”

 

        “Injection…” The word escaped my lips; it had been a memory form long ago. Was I born in that lab?

        I had reached the bridge, looking down I saw a small river far away. The bridge creaked under my weight as I put my foot on it. I wasn’t sure if it would hold me, but perhaps the large thing on the mountain would give me more memories.

        I ran across it, the bridge swaying with my momentum. As soon as I had stepped off I heard a loud SNAP and turned just in time to see the bridge fall.

        “Guess we need to find another way down huh?” 

        “Who are you?”

 

III

 

Wavelength

 

        Heh, I came up here looking for medicinal herbs and got lost; you’re pretty brave going across that bridge like that.” He smiled from behind his glasses and extended a hand, “Rei Kimura, third year medical student, at your service.”

        Lokilos…I don’t remember my last name.” I gave his hand a quick two pumps and looked behind me, “I would call myself reckless, instead of brave.”

        “What was that? I’m a bit hard of hearing.” He brushed off his blue button up shirt and picked up the small basket that lay by his feet.

        “Just talking to myself.” I pushed my hair out of my face and looked up the mountain again. Rei was talking to me but I couldn’t make out his words as a floating sort of feeling crawled up my spine. I could see the lap from my visions again, but it looked different this time.

        A boy was knocking softly on the side of my cell; he looked a bit older than me with shoulder length silver hair. He was dressed in all white, the same way I was, but his eyes were filled with fear.

        “Hey, hey, I heard you screaming, what did they do?”

        “Hurt me…my eye…” I reached up and touched the bandage over my left eye, a while ago it was roaring in pain, now I couldn’t feel it. The boy looked around and went to the small table by one of the monitors. He pulled out a small mirror, inspected his own face carefully, and then came closer to me.

        “Do you wanna see what they did?”

        “I’m afraid too.”

        “It’s better to know, trust me.” He held up the mirror and I could see my face staring back at me. I was young, six or seven maybe. My skin was pale white, bright in contrast to my hair which in places was turning silver. I let out a small cry to this and touched the heavy cloth over my eye again.

        “My hair used to be black, it turned that way too. Don’t worry about it.”   His soft voice egged me onward as I undid the small pins at the back of my head and let the bandages fall. The boy gasped softly as I reached up and touched metal inlays instead of soft skin. I looked in the mirror.

        The entirety of my left socket was covered in metal; if I turned my head I could see that it led past my ear and stopped at my hairline. I could see a fresh scar where my eyebrow used to be. If I looked closer, the tiny red capillaries were now wires, no doubt sending electrical signals to my brain and who knows what else. Instead of my normal blue-green iris, this one was yellow.

        “What AM I?”  I looked at the boy’s face, “Tell me, brother, what have they done?”

 

        “What am I?” My vision was filled with dirt now and my hands fluttered to my face. No metal, just skin.

        Lokilos, are you okay? Can you look at me?”  Rei knelt in front of me, and pulled my chin up.  He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a small light, and proceeded to shine it in each of my eyes.

        “What color are they?”

        “Huh?” Rei put down the light and let go of me.

        “My eyes, what color are they?”

        “Hazel, maybe? I think we need to get back to town.” He stood and offered me a hand up, “You said before that you couldn’t remember your last name, tell me, have you had any head trauma recently?”

        “What kinda of question is that?”

        “I know it sounds odd, but I think you may have amnesia.” Again from his front pocket he produced a small card.

        “I’m setting up an office in Nibelheim; you should stop by, if this is what I think it is I think I can help you get your memory back.”

        ****

 

 

        “So here’s my theory, soul transfer.” Cloud extended his hands out in front of him and waved them about mysterious-like.

        “What are you on boy? Cause I want some.” Cid took a long drag from his cigarette and shot the blonde a cynical look.

        “Soul transfer! Like maybe the soul knew the body was dying and jumped to…um…”

        “Your theory is full of holes, like your pants.” Tifa snickered, eliciting a look of suspicion from Cloud.

        “You would know…” Cloud ducked, expecting a hit from Tifa, but her attention was on Vincent. He was sitting on the window ledge, looking out at the October sky. Leaving Cid and Cloud’s bickering behind her, she went and knelt next to him.

        “Are you okay?”

        “…No.”

        “Vincent…if you want we can talk somewhere else.” He turned to face her concerned eyes.

        “I have nothing to say…I am in a state of disbelief.”

        “I think we all are.” She put her hand on his shoulder, “But you don’t have to bear it alone, you know?” He looked at her, wanting to say something but decided against it.

 

 

*****

 

I followed Rei back into town, not believing that from the time I had walked in here that my life would be changed. One side of the town was the marketplace, a series of wagons and vendors that lined old buildings. In the center of the square sat a large fountain that someone was repairing avidly. The other side looked under construction and Rei pointed at the large building.

        “When I pass my apprenticeship my office will be on the top level.” He smiled making his gray eyes light up like a child’s. I smiled too, “You must love what you do.”

        “Oh, of course. I love helping people; always have. And I work with the best staff. We may be small but we’re handy. That sounds so corny, huh?” He laughed and motioned for me to follow him inside the looming building. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a large mansion that sat on top of a hill behind an iron gate.

        “What’s that place?”

        “Oh…that’s the old ShinRA mansion; I think two men own it now.”

        ShinRa…that name sent a twitch through my system and I felt a spark of anger. But, why?

 

Inside, we walked into a small room with an exam table in the middle of it. On the opposite side of the room was a small desk with many organized papers and books. One could tell that Rei was a very tidy person if not a bit anal on keeping things clean.

        “Go ahead and sit on the table for me will you? I’m going to see if my assistant is in.”

 

****

 

        With anxiety racing in her gut, Tifa ran to the office where she worked, hastily pulling her uniform over her white top. The handyman fixing the fountain stopped to ogle her and she shot her a piercing look before quickly running in the door.

        “Doctor! I’m sorry I’m late!”

        “Actually you have perfect timing; I want you to help me in a rather unusual case.” Rei handed her an empty file, “I just need you to take some notes for me, okay?” Tifa’s heart sank a bit, she had hoped on learning more about nursing rather then being a secretary.  None the less, she pulled her hair back into a tight ponytail and entered exam room one.

 

       

IV

 

Cocoon

 

        “It’s you!” Tifa cried and promptly dropped her folder as she saw Loki sitting on the exam table. Loki cocked her head to the side at Tifa, “I’m sorry, do I know you?”

        “Ah, that’s Tifa Lockheart, my assistant.” Rei said calmly as he warmed his stethoscope with the palm of his hand, “Do you know her from previously, Tifa?”

        “I…uh…I…” Tifa stammered as she picked up her folder with shaking hands, “We- we’ve met.”

        “I’m sorry…” Loki smiled a little then dropped her head in shame, “I don’t recall you.”

        “I’m sure you will when your treatment is done. Now, I’m going to listen to your heartbeat, alright?” Rei opened Loki’s shirt a little and placed the stethoscope over her heart, listening intently.

 

        After the initial examination had been taken care of Rei pulled up a chair for himself and sat eye-level with Loki. From his pocket he procured an old watch on a gold chain. It had a small fisherman in a river engraved on it and seemed to be flaking in places.

        “My father gave me this watch when I was little; he also believed in the art of hypnosis. While some doctors don’t believe it works, I have seen incredible feats of memory come out of it. I think that it will work the same way for you as well.” Rei motioned for Tifa to dim the lights, as she did so with fear in her heart. She wasn’t sure if Loki would be ready for her own memories.

        “Is there a place you want to start?” Rei asked and Loki looked up to the ceiling in thought, “How about when I was a child? I would like to know my parents.”

        “Alright. Now just follow the watch with your eyes, and listen to my voice.”

        Rei lured Loki down into an almost comatose state. She slumped forward, her head still up, eyes moving back and forth.

        Back and forth.

        “I want you to go back to when you were a child, do you understand?”

        “Yes.” was the emotionless reply.

        “Where are you right now?”

        “In a laboratory.”

        “What’s going on?”

        “I’m lying down…on a hard bed. I can’t move my arms or legs…”

        “Why not?”

        “The Doctor tied me down so I wouldn’t struggle…”

 

*****

“Stephan, please hurry with that syringe!”  Hojo’s impatient voice came from behind me. I struggled against the leather bonds but he put a thin hand on my naked chest.

        “You will only make it worse for yourself.”  Another man stood over me now, his short black hair greased to his skull. He studied me with his murky eyes then held the syringe in front of his face and pushed some liquid out. It was a clear green and I struggled to move.

        “Twenty cc’s this time, I’ll hold her.”

        “No! Nonononononononono!!!” I screamed as Hojo leaned his thin frame over my own; he was heavy for some reason and making it hard for me to breathe. I felt a pinch in my left arm and screamed again.

        “Make her STOP.”

        “It will take effect soon doctor!” Stephan cried frantically, and I began to feel heavier and heavier, slow and lethargic.

        “Good. Now hook up the IV line…”

 

****

 

        Loki shook her head in frustration, “I lost consciousness.”

        Rei looked over at Tifa, who had distress permanently stamped on her face.

        “What’s the next thing you remember?”

        ******

 

I woke in some kind of thick water, feeling a hard tube that was in my throat. Dimly I could hear a respirator and a heart monitor as I opened my eyes. Numerous wires and tubes were coming from me; I realized that the sick bastards had even invaded my womanhood with them. I bobbed along with the water, anger and guilt festering.

        Tap tap.

        I looked up to see the silver haired boy, but now he was older, looking in on me with concern. With great effort I moved my hand on the glass and scraped two fingers along it. He touched the outside of it with the same ones.

        “There he is!”

        “Get him!”

        I saw two guards come into the room and seize the boy by the waist. He screamed and bit one on the hand, before the other stuck a syringe into his neck. He fell, and I wanted to cry.

 

****

 

        Tifa felt a tear slip down her face as she clutched her notes to her chest. She wanted to Rei to stop, but the look in his eyes was…he was obsessed with Loki’s story and the damned watch kept going.

        “Doctor…”

        “Who is the silver-haired boy?”

        “My brother.”

        “Does he have a name?”

        “I don’t know.”

        “Tell me, how did you escape this place?”

        “Doctor!” Tifa stepped forward, “I think that’s enough!”

He gave her a look, and then turned back to Loki. That was it for Tifa, she turned and fled from the room.

       

*****

 

I was back it the Plexiglas cage sitting on the floor, when a door slammed and  Stephan came running in.

        “It’s horrible, horrible!”

        “What, WHAT?”

        “The President…it’s horrible.”  Hojo sneered at the incompetence of his underling and snatched the paper from his hand.

        “Let me see that…to the staff of project 3217...I regret to inform you that from the results of not only the physical test but mental evaluation, your project, 3217, has been deemed a failure. It is unable to be controlled and therefore cannot be admitted into SOLIDER. Your orders are to terminate it and all files relating to it, immediately.” Hojo’s voice faded and he looked worn out.

        “All this work…all of this…our revolution. Unable to be controlled!?”  He threw the paper to the ground, “Stephan, you’re fired.” he said in a hollow voice.

        “But I did nothing but obey you sir!”

        “I have no more need of you, report to HQ at once.”  Crushed, Stephan walked miserably from the room as Hojo began to gather up the papers.

        “You heard it too. You’re a failure, like all the rest of them.” he began to typing rapidly into his keyboard while I sat silently by, bewildered at what he had said. I heard a horrible creaking noise and looked up to the pipe which let air conditioning into my room. A hissing noise began issue from it as well as a horrible acidic smell that burnt my lungs. I began to cough violently, my entire body doubling over with each breathe until the taste of my blood began to cloud my senses. Dimly I saw Hojo walk from the room, and I raised my fist to weakly pound on the wall.

 From my inner self, my soul, came a cry; a cry of anger and sadness, and pushed, I pushed this FEELING outward and shattered the wall of repression!

        Air!

        I ran out into the room, and now there were alarms going off, I turned the corner, ran through the door to the room of the silver-haired boy. But he wasn’t there and I remembred, his sad mako-colored eyes as they took him to the SOLIDER base. The door burst open from behind me and guards filled the room, leveling their guns.

        I growled and let my blood take over. With a cry I felt two spines burst forth from my back each with shining bone-blades at the end. I felt the pain of it dimly as red filled my vision- I swept forth and cut the throats of the three guards in front of me. The others started to fire, but I jumped, spun, knocking them down with the same force that had freed me. I landed on the shoulders of the last man standing, his fear filled eyes stared into mine and I tore them out, shoving them far down his throat, making it bulge.

        The next room, stairs, I headed for the roof, hearing cries from behind me. I let my extra appendages scrape along the walls and I came out the next door.

        An office! I had left the stairwell too soon; as I found fair-skinned staring at me, I laughed, something had snapped inside me. I jumped on the first desk, the lady screamed for help, I grabbed her by the neck, threw her. Someone tackled me, grabbed me by the throat, my spines dived into him as well, I grabbed the man by his shirt, pulled him over my head and snapped his neck. I PUSHED against this room as well and the people cried under the mental weight, some convulsing- others exploding. I screamed toward the heavens and ran back into the stairwell.

        “That’s far enough, yo!” A red-haired man in blue stood in my way, gun pointed at me. I knew him as a Turk and I smiled, before I pushed him into the wall.

        “I. Am. Free.”  I stated and kicked him in the stomach before continuing.

        The roof!  I ran to the guard-railing and looked down on the outside I had never seen. For a moment, my sane mind surface and I was taken by the night-time beauty. For a minute I wished I was in one of those homes, safe in bed with a family who loved me. Then I looked down at my hands, covered in crimson and flesh.

        No. I would never be loved.

       

*****

 

        Rei’s watched fell to the floor as the blood drained from his face at his patient’s recollection. Loki continued to stare at him, her lower lip trembling, he could hear a low cry of desperation being issued.

        “Do you want to know more…Doctor…?” She lowered her head and chuckled, “Do you want to know…more about me?”

        “I…I…”

        The door burst open and Rei found Vincent’s gun at level with his head.

 

 

V

 

Beauty of the Beast

 

 

        “Vincent, I don’t think you need to be that rash.” Tifa stepped to the side of him, trying to force his arm down. He shifted his eyes towards her, “Let go of me.”

        “Please, sir, take what you want!” Rei stammered his hands in the air.

        “What have you been doing to her?” Vincent lowered his gun, however his voice was so calm and collected that Rei shook in his seat.

        “Hypnosis therapy…I was trying to help…”

As the two men stared at each other, Tifa went to Loki’s side.

        “Are you alright?”

        “…Tifa…I couldn’t find him. I looked everywhere, and I couldn’t find him.”

        “It’s okay now…” Tifa pushed back Loki’s long hair and grabbed her hand, “We’re gonna go home now, right Vincent?”

        Vincent was still staring down Rei, so Tifa cleared her throat and repeated, “Right, Vincent?”

        “…Yes.”

 

***

 

        Dimly, I followed them out to the street. It had grown late and I could see patches of stars from under the clouds. Tifa still had my hand but I could barely feel it from the weight of my memories.

        “How much did you remember?” Tifa asked softly, I wanted to look at her but I watched my own sandals instead.

        “I was…a weapon. A failed weapon.” At my words Vincent stopped and turned. I looked up and met his eyes,

        “Never say that about yourself again. You’re a person.”

        “How can you say that…when I’ve…I…” I looked down at my hands again and for a split second I could see the caked blood and gore, dripping silently from them. My vision blurred and I felt a hand touch the side of my face.

        “It doesn’t matter what you have done…only…what you are now.” Vincent said softly and took my arm, “Come with me.”  He started walking so suddenly that I was almost dragged behind him. I turned to see Tifa enter the mansion without looking back.

 

*****

 

        “Okay everyone, time to leave!” Tifa said as she entered the great room. Cid and Cloud looked up from their game.

        “But…we’re playing Parcheesi…” Cloud complained and gave Tifa the biggest puppy-eyes he could manage.

        “And I fuckin live here.” Cid said with a slur into his teacup. Tifa reached over and knocked the game to the floor.

        “Fuck the Parcheesi!”

        “Hey!”

        “That was uncalled for…Madame President.” Cid stated and promptly fell into Cloud’s lap.

        “AAHHH!” Cloud screamed and shoved Cid onto the floor, “That’s strictly off limits!”

        “I’ll show you off limits…” Cid staggered to his feet and Tifa closed her eyes as he unzipped his pants.

        “Take THIS!”

        “My eyes! They BURN!!”

 

*******

 

        They had gone around back, where Vincent pushed on the wall making it swing inward. He led her into the room where his old coffin lay amongst the cobwebs and dirt. The wall swung shut behind them. It was too dark to see.

        “Stay there.”  She felt Vincent let go of her and walk to the other side of the room. There was a small flash of light, a smell of burning wood and he reappeared behind a candelabra he was lighting.

        “This is…the room of my punishment. The place I slept after I let Lucrecia die…”

        Lucrecia?”

        “…Yes. She was my first love, my only love, or so I thought.” He shook out the match, unsure of what to do with his hands he fingered the melting candles gently.

        “I…ah…when I first met you…you had fallen though my roof. I thought you to be dead but you were not. I was baffled as to who could survive something like that, but I remembered something. A child who born of Lucrecia…” his voice trailed off as he looked into the darkness.

        Loki’s voice caught in her throat, “What exactly are you saying?”

        “I…am not so sure myself.”

Loki got up and walked toward him, the closer she got, the less he spoke. Finally she was looking up at him.

        “I don’t know why I’m here I barely remember who I am but the first thing I knew…was your name. If you love me for me, you must say so. But, if you love me because I remind you of something you once had, I have no reason to be here.”

        “Ah…” Now it was Vincent who faltered for words. His face burned bright under the dim lighting, “Lucrecia…I had to let go…I let go…because-” he paused and took a deep breath “Because I had grown to love you.” he took her by surprise and kissed her deeply, knocking off some of the candles. She reciprocated his passion and undid the buckles that held his overcoat on. He gasped slightly, she could read a touch of fear in his crimson eyes.

        “It’s been…so long.”

        “Doesn’t matter, I can’t remember ever doing it.” She looked down but he lifted her face back toward his.

        “Don’t, I want to see you.” He kissed her again, this time stroking her neck gently. He hands traced the buckles that lined his black shirt then went down to his hips. He pulled her closer, almost unsure of what to do next, but she was already undoing her shirt, letting it slide free from her shoulders. She then slid her free hand up his right arm and pulled off the leather glove, revealing the pale skin underneath it. He traced her body with this hand discovering numerous scars on her side and stomach and with his free hand his undid his own shirt, caught up in the moment, all awkwardness aside.

        He pulled back suddenly, “Are you sure…?” he glanced over at his metal arm that was dully gleaming, “I am a monster, not a man.”

        “No…we are two monsters, trapped in the bodies of humans.” She kissed the golden metal that called itself a limb, “It is warm like you, therefore it is you.”  Vincent blushed and they sank to the floor.

        She kissed his neck, running her tongue down the natural slope of it, feeling him shiver. With his hand she began to rub his inner thigh, moving upward, he began to twitch desperately under her touch.  His hand went over hers guiding her to the right spots of his anatomy, until she felt him growing hard. She continued to softly bite his neck, hearing him pant slightly beside her. Vincent groaned and undid his belt clumsily, her hand slid inside and he almost lost it there at the first touch.

        She kissed him again while working her hand slowing, applying slight pressure from the base while moving up, Vincent shuddered and clutched the back of her head, passion moving inside of him. Suddenly she moved down his body and engulfed him inside of her mouth, he cried out both in surprise and pleasure as she lightly grated her teeth across the delicate skin. He felt his genitals twitch and tighten, rushing towards a climax.
        “Loki…I…aahhaa…” the words came out shaking, until he released into her mouth, head thrown back, jaw tight, waves of desire flowing down his entire body. She came up, panting slightly and wiped at her mouth.

        “Sorry…” he brushed his hair back from his eyes, but she smiled without saying a word.  Nostalgic, she touched her left eye.

        “This used to be metal…” she whispered and he took her hand.

        “Let’s not…think about that now.” he kissed her forehead and she wrapped her arms around him, tears finding their way out nonetheless. Vincent pulled her into his lap, sat back, closed his eyes and watched the candles burn.

 

VI

 

Sweet Pandemonium

 

        I awoke slowly, memories of the night before filtering in. The room was not as dark as before, I could see light coming from the door ahead of me. I moved slowly, as I could tell by Vincent’s breathing that he was deeply asleep.  Recollecting myself, I left the room as quietly as possible.

        Down a short hallway, I was led into a small library. And that was not all that was in there. Two tanks stood to my right as well as a steel table. My heart raced as I walked toward them, but this was not where I was once kept.

        “Who was there?” I whispered then turned back to the books. Many were stacked along the selves and strewn across the floor, like someone had been on a mad reading dash. As I walked past them, I saw that many of the titles had faded away and some were in other languages. One lay open on the floor in front of me, I picked it up and stood closer to the light provided by a small bulb.

        “The JENOVA Project…” Again I felt a tinge of anger, so JENOVA was related to me as well.

        Sephiroth read those…made him go mad.” I turned at the sudden male voice only to be faced by a man with spiky blonde hair and piercing green eyes.

        Mako eyes.

        “Cloud…?”

        “Yeah. It’s been awhile, huh?”

        “I’ll take your word for it.”

        “I was down here earlier, looking for some kind of clue…”

        “Clue to what?”

        Cloud faltered for words, “A problem of mine, it’s nothing.” He took the book from my hands, “But…if you want to know about JENOVA you can talk to me, after all, I was considered a Sephiroth-clone, a failed one.”

        “Yes…I was ‘failed’ as well. But who is Sephiroth?”

        Cloud’s eyes went wide, “Your brother! The guy you came to me about, begging me to help to you heal him.”

        “The silver-haired boy…” his face came to my mind in a flash, “Yes, I remember now…we went to Nagri.”

        “Now you’re getting it!” Cloud smiled, “So, fuck books. They suck.”

        I laughed, “Yeah, they do.” 

        Sephiroth, my brother, perhaps my purpose here is to find him. Maybe he holds the key to my memory.

        “Where can I find my brother?”

        “Uh…well…I’m not quite sure.” Cloud put his hand to his head in thought, “Maybe…let’s see…he likes snow.”

        “Snow?”

        “I kinda idolized him…and he always said that a perfect day for him would be a place with snow. So, maybe, he went to Icicle Town.”

        “Thank you Cloud.” I hugged him briefly and he laughed softly.

        “You sure Vincent would like you touching me?”

       

******

 

A few hours later, Cid was cooking eggs. He liked eggs, they were power food; made you strong. Or sick to your stomach if you didn’t cook them right.  He heard footsteps behind him and called out,

        Vinnie, that you?”

        “Good morning Cid.” Vincent went into the cupboard next to him and took out a cup. Cid saw that he was wearing a plain black robe instead of his normal get-up.

        “So, you DID have a good night then.”

        “Are you insinuating something?” Vincent asked calmly as he poured himself some tea.

        “I wouldn’t fuckin call it ‘insinuating’ I would call it ‘stating the damn obvious’.”  The eggs were done- Cid turned off the heat and began to eat them right out of the pan. Vincent sighed and shook his head, “Do we not have clean plates again?”

        “Nope. But, I want details. Was she tight?”

        Vincent choked on his tea, “What?”

        “Oh come ON, you know what I mean. Lots o’ friction baby!”  Cid smiled giddily, and slurped down another egg.

        “I wouldn’t know.”

        “Oh, so she’s a frigid bitch. You’ll need liquor.”

        Vincent looked Cid in the eyes, and then knocked the pan from his hands. The remaining egg landed on the dirty linoleum with a dull sound as he walked away, wondering why he ever let Cid live with him.

        “You bastard! Don’t sleep tonight, cause I’ll take off a damn eyebrow! NO ONE FUCKS WITH MY EGGS!”

 

****

 

        Loki walked into town, trying to determine what to do next. As she passed the large fountain she saw Rei walking down the next alleyway and decided that she would apologize for yesterday. She began to run after him when she saw another man step into view. The both hadn’t caught sight of her yet, and seeing some large boxes directly in front of her, she hid behind them; peeing thorough the tiny peephole they provided.

        Rei had his white lab coat on, his back to her it looked like he was talking to another doctor. His face was in the dark and he was wearing all black, but she got a good glimpse of his hair. Oddly enough, it was slicked back to his skull- this detail reverberated in her mind.

        It’s Stephan! The other doctor!

        Rei passed something to Stephan, a file…could it be her file? Could Stephan know of where she was? Now they were speaking in low voices, and she moved back an inch to get out of there. Her foot hit an errant can and rattled behind her. Both of the men turned, and she got up and ran.

        “Wait!” she heard Rei call, but she didn’t want to be within reach of Stephan. She was running blindly and ran right into someone.

        The man in the blue suit went down hard and she helped him up mumbling apologies.

        “Watch what you’re doing, yo!” His voice called out after her but she didn’t stop to turn. She remembered Reno the Turk and how he had tried to kill her before.

 

******

        Reno brushed himself off when another person ran into him, knocking him back. This one was wearing white and he grabbed his shoulder.

        “Hey! People walk here you know?”

        “Sorry sir, but did you see where that lady went?”

        “Why? She steal something from you?”

        “My superior wants to examine her, she has amnesia you see and, well, I have to catch her!”

        “Directions are ten gil a piece.” Reno held out his hand and the man in glasses slapped it away, gave him a bad look and ran off. Reno sighed, this was his first time coming back to Nibelheim and already he’d been messed up twice. He walked straight into the bar, and saw Tifa seated at a table. Reno shoved his hands in his pockets and sat down across from her.

        “Okay, I’m here. Wanna tell me why?”

        Tifa looked around then leaned in, “Lokilos is alive.”

        “…Nice trick. I would expect that from Cloud, not you.” Exasperated, Reno got up to leave but Tifa grabbed his arm.

        “Look, I know you’re not with the Turks anymore, but maybe you have some inside information on her.”

        “All that stuff got burned by Hojo as far as I know.”

        Tifa recanted the session she had been witness too. As she spoke she watched Reno’s eyes grow larger and larger until she thought they might just explode.

        “Another Doctor…hm…I wasn’t really in all that stuff so I don’t know, but your description rings a bell. I can make some calls…but Tifa, didn’t we destroy all the clones?”

        “Should have in that explosion.”

        “I’ll bet you anything that this other doctor has records for himself…if only we can find him.” Suddenly Reno’s eyes went wide and he smacked himself in the head.

        “The girl who ran into me! That was her, and that weird ass guy is looking for her!” He ran out of the bar with Tifa close behind him.

 

****

 

        Loki ran into a small dress shop and stopped for breath. It seemed that she could no longer trust Rei, not if he was working with that other bastard.

        I have to find a new look…and fast.

        Seeing a blue dress with purple trim, she grabbed it hastily and walked into the dressing room. She knew that she had caught the attendant’s eye, but stealing didn’t seem to be a big issue at the moment.

        “Nothing compared to killing people.” She laughed dryly as she closed the small brown door behind her. She pulled on the fabric hastily, finding that to her surprise the fit was near perfect. Only baggy around the back area, but she could live with this.

If she lived through this.

 She heard the shop doorbell ding, and a familiar voice was heard over the din.

        “Excuse me, did you see a lady run in here?”

        Loki cursed and opened the dressing room door slowly, there was only a short hallway before one re-entered the shop. She only had one shot at this.

        Loki ran at full speed out of the shop, ignoring both the cries of the shop clerk and Rei.

        “That was the dumbest shoplifter ever.” The store clerk scratched his head and reached for the phone. Rei pulled a small needle from his pocket and stabbed him in the back of the neck. The middle-aged man went slump.

        “I can’t let my mentor down.”