A gentle breeze blew over Duo's body, rousing him from his light slumber. He glared at the curtains as they rustled noisily and berated himself for leaving the window open. The sky outside was perfectly black, with only a few stars to break up the deep color. Beautiful. He smiled despite having been pulled out of his sweet dreams, then frowned as the cricket in the bathroom started up again.

I don't care what Heero says, he sighed. Good luck or not, those things are damn annoying.

Heero. Another breeze caressed his skin to coax him farther from sleep.

Duo closed his eyes and tried to slip back into his dreams. No use, he was too alert now. With a muttered grumble, he turned onto his stomach, careful not to disturb the boy still asleep beside him. Duo drew himself up on his arms so he could stare down at Heero's softened features.

The lack of self-awareness always took the tension from the Japanese's face, relaxing him and lulling him into revealing his all too often hidden side. His breathing came slow and steady, and his unconscious smile came naturally, without the manic frenzy that usually accompanied it. Strands of silky hair fell into his face, and Duo lightly swept them clear. Without waking, Heero moaned faintly and eased onto his side, head and shoulder pressing into the feather pillow.

"Love...you..." Heero whispered as he slept.

Duo opened his mouth to reply, but the words caught in his throat. Never again...I swore, never again...he screwed his eyes tight and lowered his head. I would never let anyone in again...they always leave and it always hurts...

This...relationship...that he had with Heero, he hadn't meant for it to develop. It just...sort of happened. The other pilot had been awkward at first, hell, he was still awkward, but his body had been so warm, and it felt so good to have him close...Duo smiled and looked back at Heero's tranquil form.

Duo shook his head, in awe of Heero. How did you make me open up to you? he wondered. I knew it wasn't right, that it could only hurt me...in the end...It hadn't hurt yet, but he knew that would come. It always did. He told someone he loved them, and the next moment, they were gone. And then it would hurt so much...

And why now? Why would I open up to someone like you? Duo gazed out at the stars again. He knew how cold that endless night was, how lonely death was up there. But death was lonely down on earth, too.

I could lose you at any time, in any of those damn missions...I knew I shouldn't let you in...but you were so beautiful, and you wanted it so badly...I wanted it so badly.

He chuckled humorlessly. He'd gone years without forming any more emotional bonds, save for his attachment to Deathscythe. His gundam had been destroyed before his eyes, and then rebuilt. It was safe to need a machine, machines could be repaired. Humans...they're so fragile. One bullet, that's all you need.

Except Heero had self-destructed, and he hadn't come apart. He'd been repaired. Figures I'd choose the one guy who was most like a gundam. If he blows up, you just put him back together again. He ran his fingers through Heero's hair, enjoying the touch. So nice, how Heero trusted him like this.

The cricket, fed up with singing to itself, finally fell silent. Duo smirked and vowed to stomp on it later, since he couldn't right now. Heero was between him and the floor, and the wall was to his back. He didn't want to climb over Heero just to have to tell him he was killing their good luck. He frowned again. He hadn't noticed before, but the wall was cold. He sighed and eased back under the blankets to escape the chill. He accidentally brushed against Heero's body and he froze, holding his breath and afraid he might have wakened him.

No, Heero didn't move. Duo gave a ragged sigh of relief and lowered his body towards Heero's, cuddling closer. The boy next to him put his arm over the smaller pilot, drawing him tight. Duo lay his head on Heero's chest and half shut his eyes as he drowsed.

"Love...you..."

Duo winced. There were those words again. That damn promise. That damn empty promise. He'd heard it before, it didn't mean anything. People could say anything and it would be meaningless a minute later. And now he was hearing it again, and it was slipping through his guard, and leading him into thinking it was real. Just so it could hurt again.

And damn it, it was working.

He felt Heero's fingers wrap around his braid and stroke it. Duo moaned lightly under that heated touch, losing himself in it. He could actually feel the shields around his heart crumbling. Anticipated pain, insubstantial but tangible all the same, welled up in his memory and seemed his inevitable future. All the worse, because he was letting it happen. It hurt. Oh, God, it hurts...

Heero's eyes fluttered open as something caught his attention, calling him back to the waking world. For a moment, he couldn't tell what it was. Duo was snuggled comfortably against his side. Chirping came from the bathroom as the cricket started up again, but that didn't relieve him. A shuddering sob finally made him look down and see tears trickling from Duo's eyes.

Worried he might have hurt his lover without knowing, Heero put his hand out and flipped on the little lamp he kept on the nightstand. Dim orange light washed over them as Heero sat up, hauling Duo up with him. Looking up in surprise, Duo rubbed the back of his hand over his eyes, trying to get rid of the tears. He only managed to streak them across his cheeks.

"Sorry," he mumbled, doing his best to hide his face. "Didn't...I didn't mean to wake you."

Heero lay his fingertips on Duo's jaw, forcing him to look up. "What's wrong?"

Duo shrugged. "Dunno."

The Japanese pilot would have sworn he was lying, except the American never lied. "What hurts?"

A grin broke over Duo's face even though it didn't fit his real mood. Even when he's considerate he's terse. "Nothing...I just...it's nothing..."

Heero intensified his grip on his lover, all but crushing the slighter body against himself. "It isn't nothing. Tell me."

Duo closed his eyes. "When are you going to leave me?"

The other pilot raised his eyebrows in surprise. "What?"

"It always happens," Duo whispered, without any hints of the bitterness or grief he felt. "They say they love you and then they leave. I was hoping I could get some advance notice this time."

Heero pulled Duo into his lap and stared into his eyes. "I'm not going to leave, Duo."

Duo laughed. "Yeah, they say that, too. It's okay, I guess I'm used to it by now. Don't worry about it. Forget I said anything."

Heero shook his head. "I'm not going to leave you. I love you."

Duo narrowed his eyes angrily. "You're lying."

If he hadn't known Duo's past, Heero might have gotten upset at that remark, but instead he disregarded it. He focused his energies on comforting his lover and drying his tears. "I love you. I'll stay with you forever."

Duo shook his head, his braid whipping violently. "You'll leave. One way or another."

Heero placed a soft kiss on the corner of Duo's mouth and smoothed his bangs down. "No. I'll never let go of you."

Duo's shoulders slumped along with his resistance. "But..."

"I love you, Duo," Heero pressed. "Maybe other people have left you, but I'm not them. I...need you as much as you need me. I love you."

Unwillingly allowing himself to hope, Duo looked back up at Heero. "Promise?" he asked in a tiny voice.

Heero nodded. "I promise." With that, he turned the light off and lay back down, Duo still trapped in his embrace. He felt his lover settle against him again, and he kissed his forehead reassuringly. "I'll always be here with you."

Duo allowed himself a small smile. "I...I trust you, Heero."

Heero shook his head knowingly. "No, you don't. Not yet. But you will. I promise."

The End