It was a simple question -- if I had been asking anyone
but her. "Do you love?" Three words. They certainly weren't the most difficult
ones I'd spoken recently -- if I had been speaking to anyone but her. It
was a simple question, but I was so hesitant that I almost walked away
without uttering a thing. Once I had asked, though, my entire focus was
on her: if I missed her answer, I'd have to ask again or never know.
She blinked. "Do I love? Doesn't everyone love someone, or something?"
"I don't know." Another difficult three words for me to say, but not as difficult as the ones before.
"Oh," she said, sounding understanding. "You're curious." She blinked a second time before she continued. "How can I help?"
Was she as innocent as she seemed, or could she tell what I secretly and truly wanted from her? "You're so different from the others," I clarified. "Do you love like them? Can you?"
Finally, she looked up at me, eyes serious and devoid of the innocence I had been expecting. "Your mouth said 'Do you love'. But. You were asking something more. What was it?"
It burned, her question acidic and sweet at once. She had known better than I did the answer to her question. Her eyes burned me as well, so full of an emotion, an expression, one that I could not identify. I'd never felt anything like this before. I opened my mouth to answer her, in hopes that it might alleviate the burning.
Her eyes held me. I could not speak. I could not move. I could not breath. Her eyes held me, held everything.
And then she was there, here. She was kissing me, touching me, undressing me, licking me. I still did not move and I still did not speak. All of her held me now.
I began to tremble. She knew everything, every spot, every way to make it the best feeling. Ah! There! More! My knees buckled and I could stand no longer. She knows this as well, and helps to catch me before I collapse, lowering me slowly to the floor and following me down.
*~*
Outside of that room, we were normal. Nothing new passed between us. We went about our duties the same as before.
Every third night, we would find ourselves back in that room, where I had first asked The Question. She would make me feel things I'd never imagined, all of them good. I began to feel happy, an emotion I never expected to be able to experience. And I began to feel guilty for not having the knowledge to return the sensation to her.
Slowly, after many visits, we began to talk after. She
began to express her wants, and what I could do to make her happy. They
were small things at first, tiny adjustments to the routine of life onboard
the Andromeda Ascendant. And she would always leave me, satisfied, after
I promised that I would take care of it for her.
*~*
She was staring derisively, amused, down at me. I lowered my eyes. I could still hear her.
"Do you have to go?" I'd asked. Of course she would have to, but I couldn't just accept it. She always left, to speak to the other, leaving me with a gentle last comment.
This reply was different, biting. "I wouldn't want to stay now." As she turned, she tossed a flexi at me. "Read it, do it," she commanded. "Harper's waiting for me."
I winced at her words. I read the flexi, as she had told me to.
Suddenly, it was all so clear. She had pulled Harper into a snare before me, had used him to give me the characteristics that would allow her to lure me into the same snare.
And now I was to destroy Him, who had been my master before her. The thought made me feel ill and scared; two more emotions introduced to me by the one I loved. I would destroy Him for her. For with control of the ship made flesh came control of it all.
-- End --