Trance purchases an object and puts it to an unusual use.
Disclaimer: Don’t own them, wish I did. I just enjoy writing about them. No spoilers here.
*****
“Harper.” Trance’s voice came loud and clear over the
comm. She sounded excited. Harper grinned, his cheeks dimpling. He hadn’t
spoken to Trance for at least a week. She and Beka had been doing what
Beka called ‘girl things’ on Summer’s drift. Rommie had been with them
too. Harper had missed the female company, he’d been kept pretty busy though
and the time had passed quickly.
“Trance, my sparkly purple babe, where have you been, you got back hours ago?”
Trance giggled. “I’m in hydroponics, Harper, I bought such a lovely thing on that drift. It’s a little surprise for everyone. You can come and see it first; you’ll love it I know you will.
Harper was intrigued. He left the machine shop and hurried to hydroponics. He walked in and immediately saw Trance standing over by what looked like a water feature. There was a pool and even a fountain. Trance was positively bouncing as she waited for him to come nearer.
The human engineer walked over and hugged his friend. “Missed you, babe.” He said. He looked at the fountain, then did a classic double take and looked closer.
His face flushed red, right up to the roots of his hair.
The fountain was large, made of some sort of red shiny material. It was also anatomically correct and judging by the spurts of water emitting from its pulsating head, fully functional.
Harper looked at Trance. “Er, babe, do you know what this is?”
Trance smiled her small purple face lighting up with pleasure. “Harper of course I know what it is, I am the medic after all. It’s a beautiful sculpture of a human penis. I’ve never seen one quite like that though.” She looked significantly at Harper’s pants.
Harper flushed again. “It’s because it’s… er… um … Ready for action.”Trance looked intrigued. “What sort of action, Harper?”
Harper didn’t quite know what to say. He didn’t think it was up to him to give Trance a thorough lesson in human reproduction.
“Anyway,” he blurted out, opening his mouth before engaging his brain, “it isn’t a sculpture it’s a dildo.”
Trance looked at him a puzzled expression on her face. “What’s that, Harper?”
It’s something that women use to give themselves pleasure. When they’re on their own, don’t have a man around. Ask Beka, she’ll explain.”
Trance looked even more puzzled.
Oh boy was he getting hot under the collar. Tyr wandered in at that moment and Harper turned to him gratefully.
“Tyr, I could use a little help here.” He indicated the ‘fountain’. Tyr laughed a deep rumbling laugh; it was amusing to see the little Professor so flustered.
“Do not worry, boy. Can I assume that Trance requires an explanation.” Tyr smiled enigmatically at Trance. “Men and women use such devices to give them sexual pleasure, either when alone or with a partner of the opposite or same sex. The appliance is inserted into one of the body’s orifices and manipulated to bring the user to orgasm. It is not something that a Nietzschean would require. I do however, know the principles of their use.” He smirked at Harper. “That was not so hard, boy was it?”
Rev had entered during Tyr’s explanation and as quickly left again. That was more information than a Magog either wanted or required. Life was so much easier when you impregnated your partner by biting them. He was celibate now anyway and human sexual practices held no interest for him.
Rommie of course had been there the whole time in all three of her incarnations. Andromeda spoke to her hologram. “I have of course seen the sexual act performed in every one of its permutations and positions. No human has an appendage that size or colour, why is this one so large and such a bright red?”
Holo Rommie shrugged. “As to the colour I have no idea, I assume that the size is to make all the males feel uncomfortable and inadequate by comparison.”
The avatar who had been standing so quietly in a corner that none of the others had noticed her replied to the hologram and the ship. “I have no idea either but it is very amusing to see Harper so ill at ease.”
Trance had been listening closely to Tyr’s explanation. Her mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ from the shock that his words had given her. “You mean that humans stick this thing up their vaginas?”
“Of course,” Tyr was totally nonplussed by her question. “Their arses too, or they get someone else to do it for them.”
Dylan was the last but one crewmember to walk in on the scene. He took in Harper’s embarrassment, Trance’s surprise and Tyr and Rommie’s amusement. “Did something happen that I should know about? “ He queried. Then he got a glimpse of the ‘fountain’.
“Oh,” he muttered. He blushed almost as deeply as Harper. “That’s different, Trance. I don’t think I’ve seen one of those used as a fountain before.” He checked his watch. “Is that the time? Didn’t realise it was so late, things to do you know.”
As if a spell had been broken Harper also made a move. “Well, sparkly babe, I have to be going too. Broken stuff to mend, that kind of thing.” He made a hasty exit, almost colliding with Dylan in his haste to leave hydroponics.
Tyr gave his throaty chuckle once more. “I shall be working out, if you require any more instruction in the use of the dildo you know where to find me.”
Trance nodded gratefully. “I will be sure to do that, Tyr I imagine that you would be a most able teacher.”
Beka arrived just as Tyr was leaving. She looked round hydroponics. “Where are the boys?” She asked innocently. Trance giggled helplessly, Rommie was sniggering over in her corner. “Oh, Beka.” Trance could hardly speak for laughing. “Did you see their faces?”
Beka put her arm round her purple lover and kissed her open mouthed, their tongues twining. Trance’s tail curled up to caress Beka, as Rommie came over to join in.
“I had a ring side view thanks to Andromeda,” Beka laughed again. “Harper’s face was a picture, and Tyr, so matter of fact. Perhaps he would like to give me some instruction? That’s the most fun I’ve had for ages, apart from our ‘girl’s’ trip that is.”
Trance started to dismantle the ‘fountain’. If only they all knew the uses that ‘Big Red’ here has been put to over the last week. Their eyes would pop.”
“That’s not all that would pop.” Beka sniggered. “Perhaps we should let them watch one day. We could do a little comparison. I can guess who would come closest.”
It was Trance’s turn to snigger. “You might be surprised. Don’t forget I’ve seen them all not ‘ready for action’ as Harper so delicately put it. “There’s a certain engineer who I wouldn’t mind having a little action with, although I get the impression that he isn’t quite as experienced as he would like us to believe. Perhaps I could teach him?”
The three girls left hydroponics, Trance carrying the dildo. They made their way to the Maru and in the privacy of her crew quarters they put ‘Big Red’ to all the uses that Tyr had listed and a few more that he would never in his wildest dreams have imagined.
The End